Dear So Weird TV Staffers,
I have noticed lately that many of you are leaving the office looking lumpier and lumpier each night. I have also noticed that I have to restock the office supplies closet on a more and more frequent level. I do not want to be indelicate, but please stop stealing office supplies. On an unrelated note, I would like to thank you all for the staplers, three-hole punches and reams of copy paper you gave me for my last birthday. It was very thoughtful of you.

Sincerely,

Alana